Lessons from Lockdown #3

(If you are reading this on my website, you have NOT missed #2 – that one had been published here last year under the name of Punto!)

My third and last (for now) tip is … mindfulness.

Maybe you are a fan already.

Maybe you think it’s too esoteric for you…

Newsflash: you don’t have to buy a special cushion to sit on and you don’t need to wear anything special. You can do it anytime, anywhere.

I have been meditating for many years, not always very consistently, but … for the past 4 months, I’ve done it once a day. And I found it very helpful for several reasons.

  • After the many hours of screen time (already mentioned in the ‘1st lesson’), it helped me to ‘open my mind’ after having been ‘focused’ for too long. It felt like a true break.
  • Also, the fact of simply ‘being’, instead of ‘doing’ something, felt like a breath of fresh air.
  • Having a ‘formal practice’ of mindfulness enabled me to finetune my ‘awareness’.
    • It helped me to notice stressful thoughts more quickly, so I had the option to analyze them and even let go of them so they wouldn’t keep on bothering me.
    • I noticed my anxiety at the beginning of the confinement.
    • I noticed my sore throat in May…
    • I noticed a lot of things, actually and I can honestly say I got to know myself better… certain reactions, patterns, values…

Noticing allows you not to react, but to respond.

Or as Viktor Frankl said:

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

Mindfulness helps me to notice that space. Without it, I don’t see it and therefore I have no freedom.

  • When I do it at night, it helps me to unwind. When I do it in the morning, I somehow start my day better.

Don’t get me wrong, it didn’t make me totally zen and I’m definitely not mindful 24/7.

But… I’m still grateful for it and therefore it deserves a spot here.

Do you want to know more about mindfulness?

Since Covid started, I’m offering ‘The Truth about Mindfulness’ for free. If you are interested, go and have a look here. Feel free to share.

As of today, you can also apply for my free beta-course: ‘Boost your resilience!  From overwhelm to more balance’. Check out this link to see if this would be something for you and if not, maybe you do know somebody who’d love to participate. Thank you for sharing!

Lessons from Lockdown #1

My last ‘live’ training was on March 10.
That is exactly 117 days ago (I did count).
I think that’s long enough to come up with some evaluation of what worked well to deal with the stress and overwhelm of this situation. Has it been a challenge? YES! I am not going to lie. Did I come out ok? YES!

Challenge #1

Everything went from ‘live’ to ‘online’. All courses had to be ‘zoomified’.
This was a lot of work. This is not just a matter of installing yourself in front of the computer. No… content needed to be adapted as well as the training methods, etc…
While I did/do not miss the commute to Brussels (not sure I want to go back…), this drastically changed my hours in front of the screen…

  • Trainings = zoom = screen
  • Meetings about the trainings = zoom = screen
  • Preparing the trainings = screen
  • Admin and mails = screen
  • (Checking in on friends = zoom = screen)

 

Spending a lot of time behind a screen is tiring.
Only interacting with people on a screen (sometimes even with their camera off) makes it much harder to really get the ‘full picture’ and is much more tiring for the brain.

My tip

Regular breaks (away from the screen) and ideally at least 1 longer break outside, in nature.
Even when the lockdown rules were still quite strict in Belgium, we were allowed to go for a walk. It was a bit unfortunate I live in a city and we were not allowed to take the care to go elsewhere but … there was always some ‘green’ to be found.
Walking in nature and opening your senses to what is going on around you is just what your brain needs after focusing on a screen for too long.
If on top of that, you make it a ‘slow’ walk, it kind of calms down your nervous system after all the stress you went through during the day.

If you want to know my other tips, make sure to stay tuned…

Stress management in times of a CRISIS

(view from my living room – thought it was fitting, given the circumstances…)

 

Most of you will know I’m a trainer specialised in (amongst others) stress management, resilience and burnout prevention.
I have a lot of tools and I try and walk my talk but… the current crisis has taught me that, in times like these, ‘even I’ sometimes need a reminder… And in case you do too: here are my tips.

Notice your stress

I consider myself to be rather practical, not very ‘panicky’…
Rationally I was dealing very well with the whole ‘confinement situation’.
However, I did notice some things:

  • When I was shopping 10 days ago, I reached for the candy near the check-out. And when I got home, I didn’t have my healthy lunch, I ate the candy and not just one, no… I had to finish the box.
    Normally I limit my sugar intake. It’s a choice and once you’re used to it, you don’t have too many cravings… But this ‘need’ for sugar told me there was stress in my body. And noticing it, helped me to address it.
  • At the beginning of last week, when I woke up to go the toilet and then got back to bed because it was too early to get up, I noticed some anxiousness. And even though I did go back to sleep, I had nightmares linked to the crisis situation. Again, this made me aware of the stress ‘in my system’ and … the necessity to address it.

How can you notice it too?

I got much better at noticing since I started to practice mindfulness.
It helped me to become more aware of my feelings, thoughts, physical sensations.
I helps me to ‘notice’ what I’m doing and this gives me a ‘choice’: I can choose to keep on doing it or I can choose NOT to do it.
#youalwayshaveachoice #YAHAC…

 

Why is it important to notice stress and to address it?

When dealing with a virus, a strong immunity system is vital. Guess what: when you are stressed, your adrenals produce more cortisol which has an impact on … your immunity system. So… managing your stress is good for your immunity.

 

Manage your stress

I’ve said it before, I have been reminded now so I’ll say it again: YOU are responsible for your stress management. While you can’t control what happens around you, you can decide how you deal with it.

Keep on breathing:
When your body goes into stress mode, a breathing technique can activate your parasympathetic nervous system and… calm you down
There are many different ones. I have been talking in the past about the ‘4-4-4-4-technique’, heart coherence, mindfulness. More information can be found in the articles on my website and in the videos on Facebook and Youtube.

Don’t believe everything you think:
It’s not what happens to you, it’s how you look at what happens to you. The virus doesn’t cause the stress. It’s your thoughts about the virus that cause the stress (bold statement, I know). Maybe now is a good time to do my free mini-course

Moving:
Moving helps you to get back into your body (and not stay stuck in your mind). While I love walking in nature, this is no longer an option for everybody. But even when you are stuck in your apartment, move some furniture out of the way and do some exercise, or simply dance… Last week I danced a Nia-routine for an hour and my body and I loved it: I noticed I was smiling most of the time. I will definitely do it again. If you normally go the gym: find something online. There are so many things: exercise, yoga, dancing, … Even if you are working from home: have a short dance break: dance to 3 of your favourite songs (I already had one this morning…). You’ll be energised to return to your screen afterwards.

Structure:
Last week I didn’t have a lot of structure. I had some meetings, I had some work but in between there was a lot of ‘nothing’ (and as a result too much television, social media, etc… – OOPS: as I write this, I just receive the message that my screen time was up 69% last week!!! This must and will go down this week). As from this week I will be more organised and structured. And yes, there will still be time for exercise, for reading, for fun things, for talking to friends and family… AND it will be a lot more structured.
It calms the mind.

Selfcare:
Take care of yourself first so you can take care of others too. Think of the oxygen mask: you have to put on your own first so you can give one to your children. So take care of your own stress too, so you can deal better with other people’s stress…

The news:
While it’s important to have an update (change in the rules, etc…), I’ve chosen not to watch the news all day long. I usually watch it at 1 pm (and only part of it) and that’s enough. Notice how it make me feel. Does it reassure you? Does it make you feel more stressed? And decide what’s the best approach for you.

Social media:
While some messages are helpful and uplifting, others have the opposite effect. And even when there are a lot of uplifting ones: there is such a thing as too much screentime (see above!)

 

How do I plan to help:

  • I will offer ‘The truth about mindfulness’ for free as long as the ‘confinement’ lasts here in Belgium. For those who are not familiar with mindfulness, it can be the perfect way to start.
  • Since I don’t want to send too many mails, I will repost some old articles on social media. So if you want the information, it’s easier for you to find. (Facebook is probably a bit easier than Instagram for that). I’ve also included a lot of links in this article (you’re welcome! ;-D)
  • Working on your mindset is key. If you haven’t signed up for the free mini-course ‘Don’t believe everything you think!’ yet, this is the right time, trust me. And if you want, we can do a ‘group session’ next week. I will answer all your questions on FB. (For instance: on Monday I will answer the questions for day 1, on Tuesday for day 2, etc…)
  • If you’re done with all the free resources and you want to work on a specific issue: I offer virtual coaching.

If there is anything else you would like me to do: reply to this mail or send me a PM or DM on social media. And I’ll see what I can do.

Please feel free to pass this one to anybody who might need this…

Take care of yourself and stay safe and healthy!